Lifethusiast

Setelah kembali dari Cina dan mulai bekerja, saya merasa hidup saya bagaikan roller coaster : naik dan turun tanpa terkendali. Masa kuliah dulu, saya selalu bisa mengontrol waktu, kegiatan dan hal-hal lainnya, saya merasa senang kalau saya bisa memegang kendali. Sebagian besar bisa diprediksi dan diantisipasi, walaupun ga semua. Paling-paling masalah hubungan sosial yang sering kali ga mungkin saya kontrol karena menyangkut perasaan orang lain. Nah, setelah berkerja, semua itu berubah drastis. Bukan berarti saya tidak pernah bekerja sebelumnya. Saya pernah menjadi guru privat, bimbel, sampai guru SD. Tapi semuanya masih bisa diatur dan terkendali. Kali ini, kerjaan saya sering berhubungan dengan regulasi dan birokrasi. Segala sesuatu yang sudah saya atur, yang sudah saya prediksi sematang mungkin, bisa jadi malah terbentur sana-sini dan terpaksa tertunda atau malah batal sama sekali. Kalau sudah begitu, saya merasa sedih dan keselll banged. Maklum, karakter perfeksionisnya kental...

During my internship in Pelita 2 from February to March 2013, I was being 'set up' by the secondary school principal to perform in Cap Go Meh show (Cap Go Meh celebration falls on the 15th of first month on lunar calender). And it was not just a performance. The principal would play a traditional instrument of China called 古筝 (guzheng), also known as Kecapi, one of the staff would play keyboard, and I would sing. Yes baby, SING. I have to remind you that I am a remarkable singer... in the bathroom, where the singer is me and the audience is also me. No complaint so far. When the principal asked me to perform, I was like, "Hell NO..!" There is no way I would sing in front of the school board, fellow teachers and students along with their parents. But he is a good persuader, so I said I would try to rehearse. In the end, it was not a trial, it was a confirmed performance, and there was nothing I could do to turn back.

I have dreams. Lots of dreams. Dreams that I often afraid I would die without having any chance to make them come true. People often says to set our dreams higher and higher and higher. But what if we are not able to reach them? That's why we make plan A, plan B, plan C, and so on. But what if those plans are just crashing one to another? We end up with nothing. I have dreams. I dream big. I make plans. I make lots of back up plans. Everyday, I tell myself to dare to dream big and be stronger enough to embrace the worst result. Sometimes I cry because I want them so badly but all doors seem to close down before me. But as Katy Perry says: "Maybe you're reason why all the doors are closed, so you can open one that leads you to the perfect road", I believe in true nature. Everything happens for a reason and that reason is what's gonna build the way we are in the next moment. Whether we'll be better or worse, and whether we'll be able to reach our dreams...

I'm definitely not a big fan of France. I don't consider France as a romantic country, which is what I always hear France is known as. Unlike German or Spanish or Italy, I don't have any interest in learning French. It doesn't mean I don't like France either. If I have a chance to go to France, I would love to go without hesitation. But still, I don't have special feelings for France. Since I have stayed in Fuzhou for more than a year, I notice that Chinese people loves everything about France. How could I jump into that conclusion? Because I've been to several vintage shops which sell items from small stuffs for stationery until big stuffs for kitchenware which have French touch on them. Either the flag of France, Eiffel Tower, or pictures of France landscapes. They have Merci  for stamps, glass bottle and scissors in Eiffel Tower shape, room fragrance imported from France, etc. Of course, they also have some touch of UK, Canada, USA, Germany, Italy, ...

When I got back home on July to August, my friends asked me crutial questions: Have you gone to the cinema in China? Have you tried KFC or McD in China? It's awkward to say that I've never tried those things. Seriously. The only reason is because I find it quite expensive and not worth it. One ticket for cinema is around 100 RMB, and eating one normal packet of KFC or McD will cost me around 30 RMB. So even if I really like watching movies and would love to try Chinese taste of fast food, I'd rather save my money and buy something more valuable instead. But something came up to me lately. On Friday night, I found myself starving and I wanted to get myself something from a local fast food resembles to American fast food. But later I changed my mind and went to McD. I had french fries, nuggets and hot chocolate for 27 RMB. I think they're quite good except for the hot chocolate, it was just like water, and I threw up the next morning. So I guess the hot chocolate w...

Ga berasa, udah satu setengah bulan saya pulang kampung. Pesawat kembali ke Fuzhou tinggal beberapa jam lagi. Time flies . Ketika saya duduk di Gajah Mada Plaza nunggu temen saya sambil denger lagu hari Kamis lalu, rasanya kehidupan saya selama setahun di Fuzhou seperti video yang diputar ulang di kepala saya. Semua kejadian seru, rese, bikin sakit hati, emosi jiwa, kenangan manis bareng best friends , main gila di asrama, traveling seru, de el el, semuanya keinget lagi. Dan sekarang, waktu saya untuk me- recharge di Jakarta hampir habis. Hampir semua makanan yang bikin saya ngidam selama di Fuzhou berhasil saya nikmatin: pempek, soto, sate, siomay, asinan, gado-gado, tempe bacem, jus alpukat, sayur asem,... wuihhhh,, yummy ...!! Saya juga berhasil nge- mall ke Central Park, Taman Anggrek, Grand Indonesia, kegiatan yang praktis ga saya jalanin di Fuzhou. Yang paling utama adalah hang out bareng keluarga dan temen-temen. Hmmm, bener-bener me- recharge body and soul . Rasanya s...

Written on Thursday, July 5th 2012 I'm here again, at Langbo Coffee near my dorm. Today doesn't feel so much like the last day of me being in Fuzhou for the first academic year. It's been almost a year, but it feels like it's only a few days. Everything has changed, though: people who works in restaurants; stores and shops have changed into more fancy restaurants or drugstore; more buildings under construction; renovated church; and also people's behaviour, characters, etc. I don't really know if I have changed in the past year. I mean, yes, I've gained more than three killos and have my hair curled, but what about my personality? My character? My habit? My skill? My point of view? My aims and goals? I don't know why, but I have commited to myself to finish reading the book given by my friends before I came to Fuzhou: Si Cacing dan Kotoran Kesayangannya. I haven't had enough time to finish the reading, but it kept me alive during my wil...